Faith: Afterthoughts

I am unabashedly a LMH fan. But in the most unbiased way possible, I actually loved all his drama after BBF (Note: To me, BBF is not a drama; it's cartoons, it's ridiculously lovable, and he was just a kid.). For some reason, all dramas he was in got heart. Lots of it. Having a heart is different. Let me put it this way: QIHM is cute. Faith is heartfelt. So when it ends, it leaves a big "aaaaww" and then you just miss it. But it's not all about romance because that big "aaaaww" moment for me in City Hunter was not LYS and KNN smiling at each other, but the scene which showed a memorial wall bearing the name of Jin Pyo and the other 20 soldiers who were finally recognized for their sacrifices during the 1981 sweep mission.

Faith has that same impact. I have read a lot of criticisms about Faith, mostly about poor execution (directing and editing) and the boring politics. But there's no denying that it's got wit and heart. And Choi Young is just badass when he mighty swings that sword. Damn.

To my memory, it has one of the best dialogues (particularly of Gongnim and Choi Young) and the best character development. It's not actually a light watch for it dealt with profound issues on faith, loyalty and leadership. It fell short of epic expectations, but I'm happy with what I saw. I am going to miss the characters whom I've grown to love all through the 24 episodes. As I mentioned in one of the forums, this is one drama where almost all characters stand on equal ground. Everyone had their moments. How Faith was able to do that? Only writer Song Ji Na knows.

Looking back, I think Faith is still epic. It got me with its quiet epicness very few dramas could even come close to.

(Now for the really unbiased comment, I really wished Dr. Jang shined more and more medical scenes/conflicts like the 21st century-ancient medicine conflict, plus a grander ending for our king and queen. Lastly, I think I said this before, but Ryu Deok Hwan? I'M A FAN!)

Missing Seoul

I loved every minute of my Korea trip. Until now, I can't believe I did a cross country. Every penny spent was worth it and the memories and pictures are just overwhelming. I am surely going to tell this to my grandkids.

I loved Gwanghwamun Square. Definitely one of my favorites in Seoul. Once you've had your picture taken there, it's like a stamp of approval (after the immigration stamp) that you've arrived in Korea. Why? Because on this spot, you get to see four main Korean landmarks one: 1) Gyeongbokgung Palace (hidden behind the statue), 2) King Sejong's statue (1st king of the Joseon Dynasty; hidden behind the statue), 3) Admiral Yi Sun-sin (a famous naval commander during the Japanese invasion in the1500s; seen in picture), 4. Bukhansan (or Mt. Bukhan; seen in picture).

Dramalog #6

1. Princess Hours/Goong

2. Lovers in Paris

3. Save the Last Dance

4. Three Dads with One Mommy

5. Cinderella's Sister

6. Personal Preference

7. City Hunter

8. Boys Before Flowers

9. Mackerel Run

10. Protect the Boss (6 episodes only)

11. 49 Days

12. The First Shop of Coffee Prince 

13. Flower boy Ramyun Shop

14. Iris 

15. Queen In Hyun's Man

16. Faith ((just finished - and it's kinda special because I watched the the last 6 episodes in Korea; the 23rd in front of the Gwanghwamun Square where a scene in Ep 2 of City Hunter was shot, and Ep 24 here at the Incheon International Airport)

South Korea: The cross-country adventure

How could I not possibly update this blog with stories from Korea? After six months of planning, I finally conquered (and is still conquering) autumn in Korea.

Andong, Gyeongsangbuk-do; behind me is the Nakdong River

Very pretty autumn scene at Jukjeon's Cafe Street in Yongin City, just right outside Seoul

Biking by the Han River

Sitting at the doorstep of my traditional Korean room at Hahoemauel, Andong, Gyeongsabuk-do

Posing beside a soldier at the South-North Korea border (DMZ)

Gyeongbokgung Palace grounds with the view of Mt.Bukaksan

Sanggojae!!!

For one thing, I feel like watching again the dramas which I've seen filming locations of. Second, I want to do this all over again. Where to next?

I wish to write a more detailed blog of this adventure. But I'm anticipating the loads of work that awaits my return to the Philippines. Nonetheless, I am sure that the mental snapshots of my Korean autumn adventure are here to stay with me for a long time.

I hate you

Dear Korean Embassy, 

I hate you for making me worried-sick for a week! But anyways, I'll see you in 3 weeks!

Me

Bukas na

'Tangina! Kalma lang!

Three more days of restlessness

So I'm singing my blues away

Astrology and anxiety

I am not religious. But now, I'm summoning my mystic tendencies to provide myself comfort in times of gripping anxiety. I resorted to reading astrology to see if lady luck is on my side.

This Week's Virgo Horoscope General: Financially you will be lucky this week in respect to monetary transactions. Some of you will undertake a distant journey which will be hectic but may be highly rewarding  Career: Those working to get a transfer of workplace can expect something positive in this direction. Using your creativity to the maximum would be beneficial. Love: Use your words sensibly in love during the week..

- Distant journey

- hectic

- highly rewarding

Cris-crossing between Sagada-Korea-Sagada is kinda hectic, and distant, yet highly rewarding. IS THIS IT???

God. Three more days.

Dying of suspense

The last time I felt like this was while waiting for the results of the comprehensive exams I took in graduate school. My heart was thumping extra hard whenever my mind is not distracted with work or any activity. It's not easy being like that for a week. Until the day came when I received a call from my classmate telling me that I passed. I literally jumped for joy.

It's all coming back to me now - the jitters and the torment while I anticipate the approval or denial of my Korean visa. My 2-minute encounter with the young female consul was easy. All requirements are complete. But I can't help but rummage through countless possibilities that may cause denial of visa based on too much Internet research (yes, this is the downside). Documents cannot be verified (i.e. Sandy was not able to answer the embassy's call for verification, or she answered differently, TIN number cannot be recognized - this I'm so afraid of), hotel cannot be contacted, or that they simple missed my documents from their eenie-meenie-minee-moe-to-whom-will-this-visa-go scheme. You know the words "consul" and "power trip" conveniently go together, eh?

Aaaahhh, it's killing me! I wanna die!This has got to be the longest week in my life! But then again, If I get denied, then it means that I just have to concentrate on my thesis (because if Korea trip pushes through, I will have to interrupt my data gathering, temporarily detach myself from my thesis and work, and then return again to Sagada to continue). Then I can reapply 6 months later in time to catch spring. It's not that bad really. BUT STILL, I WANT IT TO BE NOW.

MA Thesis: Halfway there

I passed my defense last Friday and left a pretty good impression with my panel. Upon leaving the room, my adviser congratulated me and said "I want to hug you!" That's nice. I commented that I'm halfway there already, and she noted that it's actually more than half already. Now that's comforting.

A few tweaks here and there and I'm off to Sagada to conduct my fieldwork. Overcoming the defense proposal hurdle is really a big leap forward. The proposal stage is the difficult part - took me 2 years to get here. But I feel that from here, it will become a breeze. Well, not exactly. Still so much to do. BUT it's all set. The study is all set. Now the real race through time begins.

On to April 2013 graduation!

On to my 29th year

Today is my birthday and it's no big deal, not in an angsty way, but in a steady way. Right now, I couldn't get  my mind off those visa application documents. And when I'm granted a visa, that's when the real celebration happens.... in Seoul, South Korea. :)

But thanks to all those who greeted. It is, after all, a wise decision to disable the birthday alert on Facebook.

Silencio IS the best!

Queen In Hyun's Man: Afterthoughts

It's a surprisingly good drama. There is an obvious attraction between the two leads, and unlike any other Korean dramas, both recognized the attraction from the get-go bypassing the Korean drama cliche of bickering. It's so refreshing to NOT see a couple nearly killing each other, denying their feelings, and then succumbing to love in the end.

I'm writing this because I felt affected and attached to the story. And though I hate the word "aaaww" (if it is even considered a word), I have had too many "aawww" moments all the way through episode 16. Much of my love for QIHM is because of its simplicity. It doesn't feel large scale or flashy. The two leads aren't large scale as well compared with putting, say, Lee Min Ho in the lead. And the effect? It came off as really sincere and likeable. It's feel good time travelling romance with a heart.

Though Chi Soo and Eun Bi (Flower Boy Ramyun Shop) also had a happy ending, so did Gae In and Jin Ho  (Personal Taste) and all the others, I was happier with Boong Do and Hee Jin. The obstacles and stakes were far greater and higher to be together. In the last episode, I have already accepted that they can't really mess with time and the air time is just too short to inject another talisman arc. I was just waiting for a clean finish. But at the back of my mind, there's this silent wish that somehow they'd find themselves in the same time and space. And they did!

I love Ji Hyun Woo. Too much that LMH's in danger. Haha. (He's also stands 6'1" and that's saying a lot). He's just perfect for the role. I also love Yoo In Na. I usually have a problem liking the female leads, particularly in the case of Eun Bi (Lee Chung Ah). And some couples took a few episodes before they grow on me. But Jyun Woo and In Na nailed it. They look good and real together. So real they've become real-life couple! Hee! QIHM will surely go down as one of my favorites.

Dramalog #5

1. Princess Hours/Goong

2. Lovers in Paris

3. Save the Last Dance

4. Three Dads with One Mommy

5. Cinderella's Sister

6. Personal Preference

7. City Hunter

8. Boys Before Flowers

9. Mackerel Run

10. Protect the Boss (6 episodes only)

11. 49 Days

12. The First Shop of Coffee Prince 

13. Flower boy Ramyun Shop

14. Iris 

15. Queen In Hyun's Man ((just finished!)

16. Faith (Episode 6/simultaneous with Korea)

Dramalog #4

1. Princess Hours/Goong

2. Lovers in Paris

3. Save the Last Dance

4. Three Dads with One Mommy

5. Cinderella's Sister

6. Personal Preference

7. City Hunter

8. Boys Before Flowers

9. Mackerel Run

10. Protect the Boss (6 episodes only)

11. 49 Days

12. The First Shop of Coffee Prince 

13. Flower boy Ramyun Shop

14. Iris (just finished!)

15. Faith (ongoing/simultaneous with Korea)

This is what paying close attention to details mean

Comment by 1leggedstraycat on dramabeans.com

"I don’t know if anyone had already caught this, but if Choi Young is THE Choi Young, Eun-soo is 33 years old, and wikipedia can be trusted, then Choi Young was the one who fortold that grass would not grow on his grave due to his unjust death. This turned out historically to be true until sprouts started growing in 1979. So wouldn’t that be the year Eun-soo was born? …That would be some cool fiction/reality blending. Or was the age they talked about in the English character draw ups left as their Korean age and she would have been born a couple years later? If it was, the writers were totally missing some majorly awesome poetic history/story mesh."

Now watching: Faith aka The Great Doctor (ep 4)

Singapura

I just got back from a quick and hasty* trip to sunny Singapore. It's sunny; not sunshiny. Sunshiny's more alive and fun and creative. Sunny's so-so. But since it's a new place, and I'm with great company - myself, most of the time, I enjoyed it nonetheless.

See the Marina Bay Sands - check
Gardens by the bay - check
Eat Hainanese chicken/chicken rice - check
See the Merlion - check
Makansutra Glutton's bay - check
Sight seeing at the bay area - check
Ride the train - check
Ride the double decker bus - check
Lunch with a high school friend - check
Sri Marimamman Temple (SG's oldest Hindu temple) - check
Chinatown - check
Little India - check
Orchard road - check
Ikea - check
Eat kaya toast (traditional breakfast in SG) - check
Eat in hawkers - check
Singapore Museum of History - check
Fort Canning Part - check
Mt Faber cable car ride - check which also gave me a bird's eye view of Sentosa, so I skipped Sentosa
Bugis night market - check

That's a whole lot of walking! But really, nothing's fab except for the transportation system. Nothing larger than life. Just pure cosmopolitan flair, which is too bland for my liking. Everything's man-made, make-believe, unreal and escapist. It's just...souless. And I do not, for the life of me, understand the amazement with Marina Bay Sands. That's the problem with first world, no? People tend to live in a vacuum totally obscure of the reality that is bigger than themselves or their jobs or their apartments.

*Booked the flight only 3 days in advanced; decided to go to Singapore on the day I booked the flight; planned my itinerary on the plane to SG

Still the best Korean drama moment

That moment in episode 1 when Puchai said "yes" under his breath, accompanied by a tiny smirk after accurately hitting his target with a guava. And then the epic action scene soundtrack plays for the first time.

Little missed sunshine

Nakaka-miss na ang araw. Bukas, ika-sampung araw na ng tuloy-tuloy na pag-ulan. Bahagya ko lamang nakita ang langit sa tuwing nagpapahinga ang ulan. Pero ang araw, hindi ko talaga nakita, kahit isang sinag man lamang.

Masarap ang malamig na panahon. Pero nakaka-irita ang pagkabasa ng paligid, lalo na sa bahay namin na lagi nalang may tumutulo sa bintana at nanunuot na tubig sa mga pader.

Nakaka-miss ka, araw. Pag nagkita tayo ulit, tititigan kita ng bonggang-bongga.

Wisdom of N.P.

Got this book, N.P. (North Point), two years ago only because it was P20 during a Powerbooks sale. And only because the author is named "Banana". But I only read it for a day last May, and then this weekend.

True to the Japanese form (author is Banana Yoshimoto), it's very minimalist. Well, it tackled different types of relationships ranging from the simple (sisterhood) to the complex (lesbian, incestuous, high school-old man) but somehow Banana managed to make it look simple.

Some wisdom in the book as follows:

"People are just so weak. Like me, I was raised in a terrible environment and have seen a lot of appalling things in my time, but, in the end, I still believe that people are fundamentally good. And also extremely fragile." (p.68)

"There are people like that, who have no fear of failure and are constantly starting from scratch. They never appear to be at peace with themselves, but then it's no wonder. People like that may claim what they do is right, but you can tell from their faces that they have many regrets, like they've been banished to some dark alley."  (P.93)

Shining Light

Sounds like a perfect wedding song.ss

IF and WHEN I will ever be married, I will choose this as the soundtrack to the video documentation (SDE-like but minus the usual shoes, gown and standing-by-the-window-for-the-silhouette-effect shots).

Roman candles that burn in the night
Yeah, you are a shining light
You lit a torch in the empty night
Yeah, you are a shining light
Yeah, you light up my life

You’ve always been a thorn in their side
But to me you’re a shining light
You arrive and the night is alive
Yeah, you are a shining light
Yeah, you light up my life

We made our connection
A full on chemical reaction
Brought by dark divine intervention
Yeah, you are a shining light
A constellation once seen
Over Royal David’s city
An epiphany you burn so pretty
Yeah, you are a shining light

You are a force, you are a constant source
Yeah you are a shining light
Incandescent in the darkest night
Yeah you are shining light
And all the blood I would sacrifice
For you are my shining light
Sovereign bride of the infinite
Yeah, you are a shining light
Yeah, you light up my life

We made our connection
A full on chemical reaction
Brought by dark divine intervention
Yeah, you are a shining light
A constellation once seen
Over Royal David’s city
An epiphany you burn so pretty
Yeah, you are a shining light

These are days you often say
There’s nothing that we can not do
Beneath a canopy of stars
I’d shed blood for you
The north star in the firmament
You shine the most bright
I’ve seen you dressed in an electric veil
Shrouded in celestial light

We made our connection
A full on chemical reaction
Brought by dark divine intervention
Yeah, you are a shining light
A constellation once seen
Over Royal David’s city
An epiphany you burn so pretty
Yeah, you are a shining light
You are a shining light
You are a shining light

Dramalog #3

1. Princess Hours/Goong

2. Lovers in Paris

3. Save the Last Dance

4. Three Dads with One Mommy

5. Cinderella's Sister

6. Personal Preference

7. City Hunter

8. Boys Before Flowers

9. Mackerel Run

10. Protect the Boss (+/up to 6th ep only/couldn't take it)

11. 49 Days (just finished!)

12. The First Shop of Coffee Prince 

13. Flower boy Ramyun Shop (just finished!)

14. Prosecutor Princess (SOON TO LAUNCH)

Reunion with the farmboy

And I don't even know how to start this entry.

Dramalog #2

1. Princess Hours/Goong

2. Lovers in Paris

3. Save the Last Dance

4. Three Dads with One Mommy

5. Cinderella's Sister

6. Personal Preference

7. City Hunter

8. Boys Before Flowers

9. Mackerel Run

10. Protect the Boss (+/up to 6th ep only/couldn't take it)

11. 49 Days (just finished!)

12. The First Shop of Coffee Prince (just finished!)

13. Flower boy Ramyun Shop (ABOUT TO LAUNCH!)

Kaya nating pag-isahin ang darating at aalis

I don't think there is a studio version of Kabaka. It is one of my favorite Cynthia songs ever since I heard it when she performed live at Sambalikhaan in 2009. The only copy I had was from my low res camera with really bad audio. I am glad she sang it on her last gig. And the audio's pretty good, too.

Kabaka

Words by Vim Nadera
Music by Cynthia Alexander

May ilang bukang liwayway 
na kakulay ng taglagas

may ibang dapit hapong
liwanag na sumasabog

Kung minsan ang puting puwang

palawakin man ng iyak

ay nagiging isang pumpon

ng kandilang di maupos

Hanggang kaya mong

gumising

at kaya kong managinip

kaya nating pag-isahin

ang darating at aalis

Habang may kapangyarihang

pangarapin at mangarap

walang laban ang kahapong

matuldukan ang susunod

Kung minsan ang puting

puwang

palawakin man ng iyak

ay nagiging isang pumpon

ng kandilang di maupos

Bakit ba may inaasam

tayong ayaw maganap

pagkat ngayon ay mayroong

bukas natin ang handog

Hanggang kaya mong

gumising

at kaya kong managinip

kaya nating pag-isahin

ang darating at aalis

Dumaan ako

A riveting music from the talented Ayala siblings. Even more heart-wrenching since they sang it during one of Cynthia Alexander's "send-off"gigs before she moves to the USA. She cited lack of support as her reason for leaving the local music scene, and the country for good. After decades of contributing beautiful and intelligent music, the pain and frustration of unrequited love finally took a toll on her. Just like a fruit that fell off the tree, straight to the river.

At the end of the video, both were seen tearing up. =( Goodbye to one of the musicians I "grew-up" with. 'Til the next live performance.

Dumaan Ako

*Lyrics by poet and painter, Maningning Miclat.

Dumaan ako sa tahimik na ilog

Ang buong mundo ay parang natutulog
Kung may bunga mang sa tubig ay mahulog
Parang ang puso ko itong nadudurog

Kung mag-isa ako ay huwag nang isipin

Sa dilim ay dapat pa akong hanapin

Habang may luha ay huwag pang ibigin

Sa pangarap ko ay huwag nang gisingin

Kaya kong maghintay sa mga tula mo

At makinig sa awit mula sa kabilang dako

At sa paglalakad sa lilim ng mga puno

Matutuklasan ang laman ng pusong malayo

At mapapanood ang sayaw ng mga tutubi

Sabay sa indak at lipad ng ibong humuhuni

At hihinahon na itong di mapakali

At makakahimlay sa mapayapang gabi

Dumaan ako sa tahimik na ilog

Ang buong mundo ay parang natutulog

Kung may bunga mang sa tubig ay mahulog

Parang ang puso ko na itong nadudurog

Parang ang puso ko itong nadudurog.

Coffee Prince-ing in Butuan City

"You calculated everything to make sure you wouldn't get hurt. Without a care for me." - Choi Han Kyul to Go Eun Chan

Ooops. Tinamaan ako dun, ah. Hehe.

Dramalog #1

Dramas watched online:

1. Goong

2. Personal Preference

3. City Hunter

4. Boys Before Flowers

5. Mackerel Run

6. Protect the Boss (+/up to 6th ep only/couldn't take it)

7. 49 Days (just finished!)

8. The First Shop of Coffee Prince (ongoing)

Dramas watched on TV

1. Princess Hours/Goong

2. Lovers in Paris

3. Save the Last Dance

4. Three Dads with One Mommy

5. Cinderella's Sister

49 Days

After dropping Protect the Boss for good, I tried 49 Days. So far, I am loving it! I love the story. I love the villains (asshole and bitch tandem). I love the "Scheduler" played by Jung Il Woo, who revised the typical Grim Reaper character into a young, techie, fashionable and yes, permed death angel. He's so fun to watch. And he just lights up the scene with his crazy facial expressions and rap songs. It just feels different without Min Ho, no? But it's a little comforting to know that Il Woo and Min Ho are best friends since their middle school days (that goes back to some 10 years).

I also love the human-body, Yi-Kyung. She has the face of a real human being, a stark contrast from the lady in PTB who've probably had a hundred plastic surgeries to look like that.

Status: Episode 8. I'm practicing a little restraint here. I'm not keen on finishing ASAP so I'm taking sweet time.

Finally, a tattoo on my left wrist

I know that I have high tolerance for pain. But raising the expectations to great (pain) proportions really helped me get through the first needle touch down. I realized how difficult my design was because of the details that I wanted for the feather to appear really light. Damn the hundreds of lines!

The pain is relative to the body part. But one thing is for sure: it IS painful. I mean, your skin is being scraped off! That's gotta be painful unless you're not human or you're on anesthesia. But is it tolerable? Yes. Though parts where the skin is not thick enough to withstand the skin-scraping action can get extra painful. The tip of the wrist was painful. But on the 2nd inch south, it's tolerable. The first 3-5 minutes can make you think if you're going to last until the end. But afterwards, you get used to the feeling. You can smile on the camera and eat donuts.

But of course I am only talking about a two-inch tattoo.

Now, how am I going to explain this to my father? HAHA!

Safe but spot on

"But any recourse to violence must be justified, perhaps by an argument that it is necessary to remedy injustice. If a revolutionary victory of the proletariat were to lead to putting the rest of the world into crematoria then the class struggle is not justified. It can only be justified by an argument that it will bring an end to class oppression, and do so in a way that accords with fundamental human rights."

Language and Responsibility, Noam Chomsky (1977, p.80)

Return of ze ex: Dream sequence #1

Masamang panaginip! I have gotten back with my ex! Eeeek!

May series of event or occasions kung saan lagi kami nagkikita at naging closey-closey ulit kami. It was very comfortable and I almost forgot how I hated him so much before. One time, I brought my sister with me and the 3 of us were together. We ended up in his house kaso nakatulog kami ng kapatid ko. Paggising ko, wala na siya so I called him. In the dream, it was sometime 12:30am. Turned out pumunta pala siya sa isang party sa Kamuning (suprisingly, diyan ako pupunta mamaya para mag-attend ng binyag). Sabi ko di man lang niya sinabi na aalis rin pala siya. Sabi ko rin na dun nalang kami matutulog ni Tare dahil hatinggabi na. Sabi niya hindi rin daw siya uuwi bukas. Sabi ko okay lang, magpapalipas lang ng gabi (thinking that his mother who is very close to me will be there anyway). Sabi niya, wala rin daw tao sa house nila at uwumi na lang daw kami! Ghaddd!!! Suddenly, some of his relatives barged in: cousins, aunts, etc. They recognized me as his ex from many years ago and was very happy thinking that we are officially back together. Di lang nila alam, nagngingitngit na ako sa galit at pinipilit ko lang mag-smile. But what made me laugh in my half dream/half awake state is the female cousin's comment na "may itsura ka pala" hahaha! Anyway, nagbihis na kami para umuwi. Pinipilit kami ng mga pinsan niya mag-stay pero sobrang bad trip na ako. Sa may pinto palabas, I discovered that I still have 3 pairs of slippers in their house. Yung una kong kinuha, pigtas ma. Yung pangalawa, pudpod. Yung pangatlo, maayos. Yun ang kinuha ko. Si Tare sobrang bad trip narin. Hiyang-hiya ako sa kanya dahil sa nangyari.

The dream sequence ended with me feeling angry with him. He ditched me like he always did, and it resonated in a dream! That self-centered bastard is, well, a self-centered bastard in dream and reality.

I could no longer protect the boss

I am finally ditching Protect the Boss after one month and only 4 episodes. I couldn't take the three leads, Choi Gang-Hee, Ji Sung and Kim Jae-Joong.

The No Eun Sul character is really getting on my nerves. I find it too over the top and not cute, almost like an attempt to copy the character of Park Kae-In in Personal Taste. Kae-In was so adorable. She may not be pretty physically but you will find yourself embracing her clumsiness, kindheartedness and cuteness as the drama unfolds. And she is not screaming PLASTIC SURGERY. The 2 lead actors are also annoying, though I find Ji Sung more believable than Jae-Joong. Jae-Jong tries to act cold, cool and rich but it just doesn't come across. Lastly, after BOF, I've lost interest in stories about chaebols. I don't know if I'm having loyalty issues here. But the truth is, It didn't get me hooked. I am so not hooked that I kept switching from PTB to CH, then I finished CH for the second time, and I still was able to squeeze in a full 8-episode run of Mackerel Run. Sure it has some funny moments, but on the main, I didn't like it. When all of this (thesis) is over, I will definitely go to Korean dramaland with Lie to Me, Rooftop Prince, Coffee Prince, My Fair Lady, 49 Days, Secret Garden, etc.

Dental clinic chronicles

I've been seeing my accidental dentist three times in the past 2 weeks. It started when I was at the mall with my sister killing time before the screening time of The Avengers. We passed by this alley of desserts and bought mochi ice cream. As I was about to launch a bite, my 3-year old crown tooth fell off (one of the two front teeth). Que horror! It was the perfect nightmare an almost-thirty-year-old woman could ever have. We went first to the dental clinic at the nearby commercial area but it was jam-packed with patients-by-appointment. The next dental clinic I have in mind was the one at the 3rd floor of the mall. Off we went hoping that I can be immediately accommodated. Aside from the horror of embarrassment, I was having jelly legs thinking about the unforeseen impending humongous expenses all those dental treatments usually require.

At the clinic, I was relieved that it was actually the clinic's downtime and the dentist was just waiting for the next patient. It wasn't an ordinary treatment so knowing that I was assigned to a young male dentist, about my age or even younger, is just going to ante up the level of embarrassment.

Doctor Dentist*

Doctor dentist is nice, casual and cool about it. He thoroughly explained what happened and presented the different treatment options, and his recommended one. I thought I was going to go deaf hearing that I could spend a good fortune (nearly 40 fucking thousand pesos) to have this problem fixed. That's for me to think about. Meantime, he fixed my crown for P2,800 just to arrest the emergency situation. *gasp*

I was 80% into the post and core build-up but still hazy with all the peso sign in my head. But I really wanted something permanent and dependable and perfect considering that the affected tooth is a goddamn front tooth. No room for mistakes here, doctor dentist.  Three days later, I called the dental clinic for an appointment.

Build up

He made me wait for 2 hours as he was still attending to a patient! Good thing they're inside the mall so I wouldn't be too bored. When I came back, he was so apologetic for having me wait. I said it's okay because Mondays are usually hectic. He said that he just did dental implants and every time he does, it just eats up and destroys his schedule for the day. In fact, he has not eaten yet and its already 3PM. Haha on the small talk!

I was so happy that my x-ray results turned out fine. For that, I no longer need the "post" which automatically slashes P4,500 off my bill. Woohoo! He started doing the build up. Drill. Drill. Drill. There was a downtime of an hour and a half since I had to wait for my temporary crown to be finished. He advised that I go window shopping while waiting, only that I couldn't smile yet. He also asked if I'm going to line up at Starbuck's happy hour. I said I'm not into Starbucks. Hehe. Thrity minutes into roaming in this mall I so memorize even with eyes closed, I ran into him of all people. He casually remarked that he just finished lining up at the Starbucks happy hour. I returned with a closed-mouth smile. He's totally mastered the art of small-talking his patients. Haha! 

I met up with my sister and she tagged along when I returned to the dental clinic. On our way there, I saw 1 SMS and 1 missed call telling me that the temporary crown is ready. But I did not bother replying since I'm a few steps away from the clinic anyway. And there he was outside waiting. He mentioned that he texted and called (using the clinic number).

Done with the build up. I'll be back in a week or earlier. He said he will inform me.

Semblance of permanence

Only 4 days and I received a call from the secretary asking if I'm free on that day since my permanent crown is ready. Early delivery! Me like their service! Unfortunately, I couldn't and asked for 3PM the next day instead. I went to yoga class, to my 2nd diamond peel session, and then to the dental clinic.

I arrived 15 minutes earlier. As expected, he was still attending to a patient. From inside the main clinic (I was at the reception area), I heard him ask for me.

Doc: Andiyan na si Ayi?

Sec: Oo. (she went in) Ayi? Close kayo?

Doc: Eh yun ang tawag sa kanya eh.

I cracked up inside. Haha! I perfectly remember writing my real name (not Ayi) in the patient data sheet but I don't remember where I wrote Ayi. Haha!

Well, I waited again for about 30 minutes. I couldn't bring myself to window shop due to a slight migraine. So I just stayed at the reception area.

Finally, my turn! He was apologetic for having me wait again. Of course I said "okay". I couldn't possibly say "your appointment system sucks" for he could just stab me with all those dental weapons. Anyway, I'm slightly conscious of him getting too close to my face (in a dentist way, not in a pervy way) because my face just got pricked and diamond-peeled so it was oily and, well, red.

He had a little trouble removing the temporary tooth causing him to hammer and drill it. He was mumbling how he cemented it too well. Hehe. The hammering was torture and he kept asking if I'm fine and if its hurting. It did not actually hurt but the anticipation for the moment when the tooth falls was killing me. Finally, after stressing my gums (to which he apologized, hehe), it was out! He asked me to relax for a couple of minutes while he prepares the crown. He caught me rubbing my temples because of my migraine.

Doc: Masakit ulo mo?

Me: Oo eh, migraine.

Doc: Kanina pa yan?

Me: Mga 2 hours na.

Doc: Stressed ka siguro.

Me: Oo nga eh, stressed talaga.

*Open mouth*

Doc: Stressed ka yata sa kaka-isip sa boyfriend mo.

Oh wait right there, doctor dentist! What was that all about? You are not only small-talking. Are you flirting with me now? Are you fishing information? Haha! It cracked me up inside yet again. I would have returned the flirting if my mouth were shut. I'm thinking I would have said "Mai-stress ka lang naman sa boyfriend kapag may boyfriend ka" (translation: I don't have a boyfriend, if that's what you want to ask.)

He installed my permanent porcelain crown with a little polishing at the back to perfect my bite. Nice work there, doctor dentist. He checked the rest of my teeth and saw four that need pasta. He also gave his parting words in true dentistry fashion (i.e., take care of my teeth, not to bite on very hard stuff, to floss 2-3 times a day, etc.). He ended by saying goodbye (translation: what you have there is a sturdy permanent crown already) and see you soon (translation: come back for pasta).

But I guess I'll see him around literally. I'm in this mall almost everyday, anyway. Or maybe the next time he lines up at Starbucks happy hour. Haha!

*Doctor Dentist is how my cutie pie 3-year old niece refers to her dentist

The dating scene in my book

I had a sudden gush of warm feeling thinking about how the next week is going to be like. And I'm recalling certain dates and people I need to see. I just realized that a lot of friends want to date me (all from totally different circles). Not in a pervy way. Haha!

There was Chiqui who made certain that she'll see us (Jhen and Joyce) over her quick vacation from Australia.
There's Mel who has been bugging me for a meet-up.
There's Iella who celebrated her birthday a month ago but have been earnestly requesting that I see her so she can treat me at Soderno.
There's Tin who specifically wants me to go with her to Baguio on her upcoming Manila vacation from UAE.
There's Burn who noted that I haven't responded to his invitation for a "date".
And there's my staple of friends, the Commune, who requests a weekly commune time with me.

I may love them in different levels, but I love them all. The fact they treat me as their friend makes my heart smile with utter gratitude. For whatever purpose I play in their lives, they must have found something good in me. So I am willing to play the part of returning the favor of being a genuine friend to me.

Elbi

My critique advised me to check out theses at UP Los Banos! Ma-effort at matrabaho. But I was excited at the thought of getting on the bus for a couple hours of trip outside Metro Manila.

And I did last Wednesday, May 16. Left the house at 7am, boarded the bus to Sta.Cruz, Laguna in Buendia around 8:30am, and arrived at UPLB at 10:00am. It's not that far, actually. The travel was a breeze. And I did not have a hard time finding the College of Development Communication since its just right after the main gate. (I recognized it immediately from the pictures).

I spent a good 5 hours in the library. Almost no other students except me, plus I was granted all the freedom to check as much theses I want. It is waaay more convenient than the system in Diliman where you have to fill out a theses call slip and you can only request for a maximum of 2 at a time. You leave your ID and you can only photocopy the abstract. In LB, all theses are on the unrestricted shelves. I have 8 stacked on my desk! Then the librarian noticed that I've been writing and writing. She mentioned that I can just tag the pages I want photocopied outside so I wouldn't have a hard time copying. What?! I can photocopy ALL the parts I want?! When it was time to photocopy, I took out 7 theses from the university! 7 thesis! Outside the university! (no photocopier within the college). I would've been jailed in Diliman if I did that. One more thing: No lunch break! This is library heaven! Oh god, I was hyperventilating.

In Diliman, they close the desk service during lunch, which means no theses-browsing. One time, all students were sent out of the library over a "lunch break" declaration. Plus the librarian was getting cozy with me. Turned out that she's a Nu Skin agent and she showed me the products she direct-sells. Haha!

I left the library at 3PM. By this time, my stomach is already grumbling for missing lunch. I wanted to maximize my time so I opted to skip lunch and save my craving for later at the local coffee shop I saw on my way there. I decided to eat at Boston Cafe', something I remember seeing from an FB friend. But I was disappointed! Almost all of their offerings at the menu were not available. I ended up with a so-so Pasta Arriabata and a so-so brewed coffee. I took out my laptop and checked work emails for the first time that day. I was very lucky that there was nothing so urgent.

Sitting across me was an interesting-looking bespectacled guy. He was also working on his laptop over iced tea. Wearing a plain white collared t-shirt, I can sense he's a graduate student (an alumnus, most likely) and/or a professor - basta from the academe. I caught him pass a glance on me, and he looked away. I glanced at him and looked away. And he did the same thing. Para magpapansin, I walked over to the counter near where he was sitting and asked for water. I would have devised a plan to approach him had I not left early. I just stayed for an hour because I still had some 2 hours to travel back to Manila. Too bad.

I stopped by the legendary Mer-Nel's Cake House to buy a welcome home cake for my baby nephew, Cio. Nasa elbi na rin lang, might as well buy Mer-Nel's instead of the typical buko pie.

The difficulty of going home coming from the south via public transport (how ironic since I live in the south) had me decided to get off at Magallanes, and take a very, very quick bus ride to Ayala to catch the shuttle going home.

Now I am faced with the reality that I must write. Haay.

Un-concentration camp

I couldn't muster enough mental courage to continue writing my RRL revisions. I have all the materials in place, though. I just need to write away, which I find very difficult right now. I'm crisscrossing from MS Word to dramabeans.com to youtube to 4shared. Aaah... hope someone can invent a concentration pill.

Anyway, dramabeans.com is a great website for all Korean drama fans. The blogger claims that her blogs aim to deconstruct Korean dramas and Kpop culture. I think the aim of "deconstructing" is a rather tall order. You need to peel layers and layers of social constructs and contexts. It is highly theoretical and critical (owing to the Frankfurt guys' school of thought). But the way she has been doing it so far is not deconstruction but more of recapping and reviewing with insets of interesting trivia about Korean culture. Hello, semantics. But it is unarguably entertaining and informative. And the hundreds of comments! Oh the comments cracks me up all the time, especially those pertaining to Min Ho. Hahaha! These fans are a bunch of crazy funny ahjummas! Gotta love dramabeans!

Seriously

Seriously, Min Ho, you're not human. You are too handsome, too tall, you sing well, you have a sexy speaking voice, great physique, you have dimples, you can act, you have substance (according to how you answer interview questions), you love your family, you are so cute I want to squish you, you starred in really great dramas, and you seem to be a gentle soul. Seriously. The only thing that keeps you human is your altered nose. Nonetheless, you have completely turned me into a fangirl reminiscent of my high school boyband-worshiping days. Not good at all. I'm becoming 14 all over again!

Pahabol musings

Still on City Hunter... Pangalawang beses na pero nalungkot parin ako ng todo sa pagkamatay ni Prosecutor. At na-realize ko na ang tragic ng love story nila ni Sae Hee. Ito yung pinaka-tragic ang ending sa lahat ng relationships sa istoryang ito. Anyway, I so, so love this drama. I don't think I will be watching the whole of it again anytime soon. Forty hours is too much already. I've been watching too much since March: 24 hours of Goong, 16 hours of Personal Taste, 40 hours of City Hunter and 1 hour of Protect the Boss. Now that serious work and thesis is coming up, I'd say bye bye first to my Korean entertainment land. (Or maybe squeeze in an hour or 2 per day of Protect the Boss)

...to Obsession

It has been a week and I am still not through with the hangover. Hence the blog title (previously "From hangover to withdrawal...to obsession).

I am watching City Hunter all over again (now on episode 10), alongside Boys Over Flowers (now on episode 9). How I do that and why, I really don't know. The Korean/Lee Min Ho obsession is all over me. I even dreamt about it 2 nights ago. My yoga instructor texted me that she won't be able to hold class because she will be in Pusan an Seoul on certain dates she mentioned. When I woke up, I checked my phone inbox and there's no message like that.

Can't wait for that trip in Seoul. I will really feel bad if my documentations aren't fixed by then, and if my visa application will be denied.

From hangover to withdrawal

When I finished watching Goong in 2008, I was on a hangover for a week. In the years thereafter, I would still remember the drama and relive the scenes on youtube every now and then. I even downloaded some of my favorite musical scores 2 years ago (and re-downloaded recently since my old laptop was stolen by filthy burglars). Up until last month, I still have the same affection to it so much that I watched it again and even wrote about it here.

Now I'm feeling the frenzy all over again, not because of Goong but because of City Hunter! I loved Prince Shin-gun's character, the typical Korean drama alpha male na masungit but just knocks you off when he does all the romantic things unexpectedly. But my oh my, Yun Seong outdid him by leaps and bounds! The two stories are entirely in different categories. Goong is definitely a love story following two strangers who were arranged to be married. It is so cute and fun to watch.

On the other hand, City Hunter is dark. The love story between Yun Seong and Kim Na Na is placed in the backseat and the pursuit for revenge clearly steered the whole story. The father-and-son tension between Jin Pyo and Yun Seong is beautiful, which I think this is the best part of the story. The drama actually explored more on their relationship than that of Yun Seong and Kim Na Na. On the other hand, I see a lot of the Batman/Dark Knight-District Attorney Harvey Dent relationship in the City Hunter and Prosecutor Kim Yeong Ju.

Lee Min Ho was perfect as Yun Seong. I never thought he could pull off doing action scenes given that he's too good looking. But going back to the original Manga, the City Hunter really was good looking and playboy, something he uses as a cover-up or alibi.

I finished the 20th episode at 4am last Sunday. Until now, I still have a hangover and I just can't stop watching music videos, the best scenes and behind-the-scene footages. I swear I can even watch it all over again...right now! I even downloaded its theme songs and keep playing it over and over. I really miss it - everything about it. I even miss the sight of myself watching it, laughing in the wee hours, running to a coffee shop for Internet connection, all the anticipation and excitement. It pains me that it has ended. Right now, I'm feeling like I lost something that is so beautiful. But as they say, all good things must come to an end.

More than a hangover, I think this is withdrawal syndrome I am experiencing. Moving on, I started to watch my next Korean drama, Protect the Boss. It's been 2 days and I still cannot get past the first episode. Looks like I haven't fully moved on from City Hunter similar to breaking up with a boyfriend, and then trying to date again but it just doesn't work. Haha! I miss it so much already. I feel a tug at my heartstrings whenever I hear the Sad Run action theme, Suddenly, or even Cupid. But I cannot stop it. I need to feed on the longing. It will go away soon, I know.

If my plan to visit Seoul this October pushes through, I will definitely visit some of their shooting locations. Basta I love City Hunter and Lee Min Ho! Haha! It's crazy how someone I just described earlier as a "bohemian" can fall for Korean Dramas and be all-out bakya! I love it that I can live multiple lives and everybody need not know. Hehe.

Feather and Red Star

I would have wanted as my first tattoo the traditional tattoo from Kalinga etched on my back by Apo Fang-ud herself. But it is very difficult to spare more than 12 hours of travel and a couple more of hiking. I still am not in Sagada for my fieldwork, and the possibility of it seems blurry as of the moment.  I have decided to reverse my  plan and go for the machine tattoo method first.


This is my version of the mother and child, my elder sister and her firstborn.

Mock up only; not yet the real thing

My sister's name is Angel. Born only a year apart, we grew up very close with each other. Elders refer to us as kambal or twins. We always wore the same clothes, we attended the same school until elementary, we always played together as kids and were punished together by our mother. Though we attended different schools in college, we were very close we'd meet up after school to eat out and watch movies. She got married in 2008 and I missed her so much the first week she wasn't home. I tried my best to still be there for her so I made it a point to look after her especially on the latter part of her first pregnancy.


I thought of a wing (angel's wing) but over a conversation with friends, a feather seems to be the better option. This one friend told a story about another friend of his who believes in Angels and once dreamt of holding on to the Angel's wings until a feather was plucked. Upon waking up, inside his/her clasped hand is a feather.


Dreaming of feathers means a desire to achieve a goal or overcome a challenge while the feather itself "deal with ascension and spiritual evolution to a higher plane." Different cultures have believed the feather to be a symbol of connectedness to higher wisdom and spirituality.

• Feathers were worn by Native American Chiefs to symbolize their communication with Spirit, and to express their celestial wisdom. 

• As a Celtic symbol meaning, the feather was worn by Druids in the form of ornate feathered robes. Celtic Druids donned these robes in ceremonies to invoke the sky gods and gain knowledge of the celestial realm. It was believed that the feathered cloak along with the presence of the sky gods would allow the Druid to transcend the earthly plane and enter the ethereal realm.

• The Egyptians believed that feathers were symbolic of sky gods too. Ma'at, the Egyptian goddess of justice, would weigh the hearts of the newly dead in the underworld against the weight of a feather to determine the worthiness of his or her soul.

• In Christianity feathers represented virtues. In fact, an image of three feathers were made into signet rings - each feather symbolizing Charity, hope, and faith. These rings were worn as a symbol of a virtuous soul - they were also used as wax seals. 

Source: http://www.whats-your-sign.com/symbol-meaning-of-feathers.html

The dream interpretation of feathers mean travel or the ability to move freely in life. Now I know why the typical "Bohemian" look is characterized by the use of feather accessories. According to the dictionary, the term bohemian (n) is defined as A restless vagabond; -- originally, an idle stroller or gypsy (as in France) thought to have come from Bohemia; in later times often applied to an adventurer in art or literature, of irregular, unconventional habits, questionable tastes, or free moral. A bohemian is also described as  a nonconformist writer or artist who lives an unconventional life or someone who refuses to conform to established standards of conduct

I never wanted to call attention to myself and I often feel awkward about other people saying what they think about me. I'm not into achieving a certain look, or creating an image of myself simply because I'm one person who don't like to be noticed so there's absolutely no point in image-making for myself. Nonetheless, I have found people branding me as such: artist, unconventional, explorer, free-spirit. And that was what my friend said about the importance of character when thinking of an image to symbolize yourself. Being one of those who truly knows me, he said the feather symbol suits my character well.

Aside from the feather, a huge part of my character is captured by the image of a simple red 5-point star.

According to Wikipedia, the five-pointed red star, a pentagram without the inner pentagon, is a symbol of communism. It is sometimes understood to represent the five fingers of the worker's hand, as well as the five continents. A lesser known suggestion is that the five points on the star were intended to represent the five social groups that would lead Russia to communism: the youth, the military, the industrial labourers, the agricultural workers or peasantry, and the intelligentsia. It was one of the emblems, symbols, and signals representing the Soviet Union under the rule of the Communist Party, along with the hammer and sickle.

Very few people know this side of me. For this reason, I sometimes feel that I live a double life. It is something I can't just casually discuss to anyone. Even if I am not actually "there", I still want to be reminded to keep hoping that one day, a hundred flowers shall bloom.

Aside from that symbolism, my firstborn niece is named Tala (star). She is the first in the family. The first grandchild, the first niece, the first of the third generation. And I love this child so much. So I offer this symbol to her and to the whole family as well.

I think tattooing is an exercise in self-awareness. It makes you think and reflect on who you are, who you live for, your motivations for living and reasons for being for it to be truly meaningful. For these reasons, I am confident that I will never regret my first ink.